Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
