You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
