I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
