Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
