thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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