its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
