i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize