dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
