Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
my poor anus
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Randomize
