hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
