Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
