i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
