she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
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