i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
