saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
