You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
She needs sedatives and a leash
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
