my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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