does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
