Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
