Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Randomize
