Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
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