billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
