sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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