i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
