I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
