I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
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