If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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