Slut skills are useful in every country.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
