Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
He felt like a one man threesome
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
