You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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