Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
