She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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