Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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