I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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