it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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