He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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