She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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