Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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