absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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