Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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