Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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