it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
