My nipple is on Facebook.
That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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