In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize