Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
