So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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