I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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