ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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