i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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