this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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